We made it home on Tuesday. The flight from Amsterdam to Portland was easier than the flight from PDX to Amsterdam. Mostly because they gave us a bulk head seat with a bassinet attached to the wall. We sat next to another couple with a baby. Wife from Portland, husband from Scotland. They were taking their little one to Portland to see her grandparents.
I was right about our time overseas, It was more obligation than vacation but I still enjoyed it. Most of our time was spent getting to know Brian's nieces and spending quality time with his parents. Not easy staying with your in laws for over two weeks though! Ugh. At my MIL's place everything is white and sterile. You re afraid to sit on the furniture. She was visibly shaken when the 8 month old niece spit up spaghetti on her carpeting. She insisted on doing a chemical sterilization of Titus' bottles. I told her that we don't sterilize and that washing in soapy water with a hot rinse is considered good enough. The English are having none of that. They are told that bottles have "harmful milk bacteria" in them and must be sterilized. This is soo 1950's or even Victorian. Anyhow, his bottles ended up reeking of bleach and I felt helpless because she was so adamant about it. It was that and lots of little things. Being told not to check on him during dinner. Being questioned about our choice to never let him cry it out. Both by MIL and SIL. Being told whenever he fussed, that it was "wind" and he needed to burp. No matter what the problem was. Im sure all of this stuff is part of a normal relationship with a MIL. Ive just never had to deal with one before because she lives so far away.
Brian's neices are delightful. I have become close with his sister over the past couple of years. Being pregnant at the same time and home with children all day certainly helped. She is very very different than my husband and they have never been close or even very friendly. This seems to have improved with time. They have both matured a lot in the past 7 years.
Titus is changing so much. He is not the same baby that he was when we left. Hes sitting up semi assisted. Soon to be sitting on his own. He rolls all over the place, sleeps in a room by himself in a big boy crib instead of a bassinet, eats some baby foods, laughs like a loon, lunges for things that appeal to him. When we left he still wasnt holding his head steady and needed to be cradled in your arms with supported neck. No more. In these picutres he wasnt quite sitting up yet. We have many, many more but this is a decent sample. He loved his cousins. Even with my 8 adult siblings he only has 3 cousins. All girls.
The big news this week is that the bio mom of our last 3 foster children is pregnant AGAIN. She just had a baby in Feb. of 2011. Her 5th child is due in June. The 2011 baby was adopted by a lesbian couple in Seattle. Their family is complete and they have decided they wont be adopting this next baby. She has asked the family that will be adopting the 3 girls if they wil take this baby. They are looking into all the legal aspects of it and are in shock. I dont think the mother dares to get excited or even mention it to anyone but myself and a few family members. The baby daddy is the same toothless, criminal, geezer that the birth mom swore she wasnt seeing. This was always a stipulation of her getting the 3 older children back. She couldnt have anything to do with this guy. He also fathered the baby born last year. Tsk! Now she admits that shes been with him the whole time.
We are waiting for a foster placement. Its a strange feeling, waiting for that call from DHS. It could happen today or it could happen in 3 weeks. I think even seasoned foster parents jump when the phone rings.
Jet lag is killing me. I dont even want to admit how out of control its been since we got back. Okay,, its like this. I go to bed at 6pm and wake up with the baby at 2am. His sleep is all over the place. Brian has been home most of the time but we have to get this sorted out for this next week. Adjusting to an 8 hour time difference is not easy when there is an infant involved.
I was right about our time overseas, It was more obligation than vacation but I still enjoyed it. Most of our time was spent getting to know Brian's nieces and spending quality time with his parents. Not easy staying with your in laws for over two weeks though! Ugh. At my MIL's place everything is white and sterile. You re afraid to sit on the furniture. She was visibly shaken when the 8 month old niece spit up spaghetti on her carpeting. She insisted on doing a chemical sterilization of Titus' bottles. I told her that we don't sterilize and that washing in soapy water with a hot rinse is considered good enough. The English are having none of that. They are told that bottles have "harmful milk bacteria" in them and must be sterilized. This is soo 1950's or even Victorian. Anyhow, his bottles ended up reeking of bleach and I felt helpless because she was so adamant about it. It was that and lots of little things. Being told not to check on him during dinner. Being questioned about our choice to never let him cry it out. Both by MIL and SIL. Being told whenever he fussed, that it was "wind" and he needed to burp. No matter what the problem was. Im sure all of this stuff is part of a normal relationship with a MIL. Ive just never had to deal with one before because she lives so far away.
Brian's neices are delightful. I have become close with his sister over the past couple of years. Being pregnant at the same time and home with children all day certainly helped. She is very very different than my husband and they have never been close or even very friendly. This seems to have improved with time. They have both matured a lot in the past 7 years.
The big news this week is that the bio mom of our last 3 foster children is pregnant AGAIN. She just had a baby in Feb. of 2011. Her 5th child is due in June. The 2011 baby was adopted by a lesbian couple in Seattle. Their family is complete and they have decided they wont be adopting this next baby. She has asked the family that will be adopting the 3 girls if they wil take this baby. They are looking into all the legal aspects of it and are in shock. I dont think the mother dares to get excited or even mention it to anyone but myself and a few family members. The baby daddy is the same toothless, criminal, geezer that the birth mom swore she wasnt seeing. This was always a stipulation of her getting the 3 older children back. She couldnt have anything to do with this guy. He also fathered the baby born last year. Tsk! Now she admits that shes been with him the whole time.
We are waiting for a foster placement. Its a strange feeling, waiting for that call from DHS. It could happen today or it could happen in 3 weeks. I think even seasoned foster parents jump when the phone rings.
Jet lag is killing me. I dont even want to admit how out of control its been since we got back. Okay,, its like this. I go to bed at 6pm and wake up with the baby at 2am. His sleep is all over the place. Brian has been home most of the time but we have to get this sorted out for this next week. Adjusting to an 8 hour time difference is not easy when there is an infant involved.
Wow sounds like a crazy, but good overall, trip! We are headed back to visit home (which is in the same country at least, but still a 3 hour time difference!) this summer. I imagine I will be writing a similar post, lol! My MIL is not as judgmental - but dealing with 2 toddlers out of their own homes, beds and routines should be very interesting!
ReplyDeleteWow, saddened, but not surprised about the girls' mom. So, so sad. And another foster child for you, huh? Wow! You are braver than I am, lol! Good luck!
Titus is really getting to a fun age, huh? Enjoy it all, momma:)!
Faith , we are on the shelter care list. Could be a longer term placement but should be only 1 child. Im home all day anyway so we figured why not?
Deletegood luck with your trip this summer, traveling with small children is challenging but fun! I loved taking the twins and the girls places.